Skip to content


her bedroom window 
looked out on the pine barren. 
open, the air, cool, cleansing, cleared 
up the rotting past. she was not 
sure she wanted to finish dying. 
she could glide out, not a spirit 
or a ghost, a woman desperate 
to be, desperate to leave her aged 
broken body behind. this is not 
a death-bed scene, but a 
temporary stilling, a river dammed
but unstoppable, pushing, pushing 
against its limitations, her body 
merely a pile of uprooted tree 
stumps, dead leaves, twigs. alone 
she left no witnesses to her decay
naked under a sweat-drenched
quilt, inherited from her mother
blocks depicting farm scenes 
plantings, harvestings, thanksgiving, 
not depicting her mother’s ten 
childbirths, the endless tasks, 
the numbing late winter mornings, 
constant tending of fire. 
dying just another chore left undone. 
the daughter will leave behind 
her well-worn dirty slippers 
faded violet cotton pajamas 
her tawny bathrobe, soot-stained 
from stoking the woodstove, bereft 
garments, disordered, hastily
disgarded, as she if she were
trying to escape the saints in
the gold chariots directed 
to preserve her, to resurrect her. 
she thought, now i am not a mother 
not a wife, but force, annihilation 
havoc and ruin, something that is 
and is not a woman, power
the thing i have been waiting for – 
to be.

Attain by Sensetus

~ Alexander Perez

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *