CHARACTERS
Magician
Masked Man’s Assistant
Commentator
A dark stage engulfed in smoke. Deep red velvet curtains on either side of the stage, drawn open with gold string. A harsh yellow spotlight blares, revealing a wooden table centre-stage, much like an operating table. There is a large box with gold borders on the table. Let Me Entertain You by Robbie Williams is the background score.
COMMENTATOR:
Presenting to you… the Man in the Mask. The world’s greatest magician and here, with the hypnotising hips, his live prop, his Spicy Ornament.
COMMENTATOR makes obscure gestures and claps twice.
COMMENTATOR (commands over his shoulder):
-come here Darlin’. Give us a twirl. That’s the way. Isn’t she faya?
I dare you to take your eyes off this stunning vixen as she’s SAWED IN HALF. Well, the outfit’s a two-piece so she’s already halfway there. She looks like she knows what he expects her to do as she slowly climbs over the table.
Silence. THE MASKED MAN pulls the box over her head as though swinging a garage door shut. A single click echoes, sealing her fate.
He yanks her left arm out of a hole in the side of the box. She waves.
COMMENTATOR (excitedly grinning):
What a tease.
THE MASKED MAN yanks out her delicate legs one at a time.
COMMENTATOR:
The stockings are a nice touch. Let’s hope we can see them again. Here’s a nice steely blade, ladies and gentlemen.
THE MASKED MAN splits her in half, divvying up her assets.
COMMENTATOR:
Oof, that is one messed up girl!
Let’s see what condition she’s in.
COMMENTATOR walks around the box.
(His voice grows soft) Beautiful as ever.
THE END